Over sharing

It should come as no surprise: I love social media.

I am that person.
The person that shares way too many photos of her kid.
Who updates her status way more times than the cool people do.
And I check my Instagram & comment on pictures- a lot.

It makes my heart swell up with thankfulness that some really smart guy created a way for me to see pictures of my little niece 2,000 miles away.  Bless you, Mark Zuckerberg.  Bless you.

I adore the fact that I can see my friend's kids & that I can keep our families up to date with our daughter.  I also love just seeing life through other people's eyes.  I know that I'm seeing the best of what they're seeing and that's special.  Getting a peek into my loved one's days is so, so sweet.  

Reality is though: There are negatives.

People's feelings get hurt so easily.  It's a comparison death trap.  It's time consuming.  It takes away from being in the moment.  It's not "real life."  People misread you.  You misread others.  The list goes on.

I've had to work through various issues with social media over the years & a big issue for me has always been over sharing.

Before, it was over sharing personal matters on my old blog.  I really didn't hold anything back.  A part of me loves that- no restraints- just lay it all out there.  But I learned a lot over the 6 years I did it and when I said goodbye I was so happy.  I still am.  This blog has been pretty light in the content department.  If this is your only interaction with me- let's just say you have no idea what's going on in my life.  And I've been intentional to make it that way.

So healthy for me.  

I still tend to over share though when it comes to Eliana and motherhood.  I find myself sharing photos of her with anyone that will look at them- and it really comes down to the fact that I am so incredibly in love.  What you love, you praise, right?

The last few months I've been examining my heart & motives in regards to this & while I still don't have any strong conclusive thoughts- I do recognize that I over share.  If people don't care for the updates, I know they are old enough to stop following me then on these social media sites- so that's not what bothers me.

What bothers me is that I have probably been a really hard pill to swallow to any young woman longing to be a mother right now.  And that breaks my heart.  Deeply.

I have tried to find some kind of balance- but it's been a lot harder than I imagined.

Social media is such a delicate & murky part of real relationships.  I wonder if I'll ever feel I have a handle on it.